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The Fixer Upper (2009)

The Fixer Upper (2009)

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3.85 of 5 Votes: 1
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0060837381 (ISBN13: 9780060837389)

About book The Fixer Upper (2009)

I'd really give this a 1.5 star rating but because Ella Kate was a cantankerous, old bitch who made me laugh, I'll swing up to 2.So this story is about a vapid, young lawyer who is framed for bribery and mishandling taxpayer money...I guess...and winds up in a two-stoplight town in the south, fixing a broken-down house that was just left to her egomaniacal father in a will. She falls in love with a jerk who pretends to not be a jerk but she also sort of has the hots for the jerk's dad. There's a old woman/squatter who lives in the house, there are half a dozen men who stop by and do anything and everything they can for this vapid, young lawyer, and there are some FBI agents and a flighty New Age mother. She has close female friends who don't factor into the story at all except when convenient. Oh, there's a also a lot of naming brand names and song titles.Not really a story for me. I liked the idea of fixing up an old house. I'd love to be able to do that at some point but I know my limitations, which involve sucking at home improvements and not successfully making useful, non-edible things with my own two hands despite all the effort I've made. Which reminds me: How on earth did Dempsey (the vapid, young lawyer) take to DIY home improvement like that? And why was she never crippled with soreness? I mean, she said she was in pain once, but it sure didn't hinder her much.Pro-tip for new lovers: When you manage to get someone home, don't try to have sex with them all over the house if you've got your own residence out back. Be a little respectful of your father's domicile as well as your new object of carnal attention. Also, if your new sexual partner wakes in the wee hours of the morning and asks to be taken home, get your ass out of bed, do not try to be cutesy with the "but I want to snuggle you til morning" shit, and take that person home. Because if you don't? You're a disrespectful asshole and you should probably be on relationship probation. Related: If you're molesting this newfound playmate of yours at a party and said playmate says "Ok, I'm done, I need to go back inside," please let your partner go back inside and do NOT continue to stick your tongue down your partner's throat or your hand into your partner's clothing. If you are the type to engage in this type of jerky behavior, I wish a load of itchy lice upon you along with a case of dysentery. If you are the new partner in this situation: This guy's a creep. Date someone who respects you.So...yeah. I didn't enjoy the story. It's light and fluffy and I am totally the wrong audience. This book is terrible.The entire first half is about a spoiled rich girl with daddy issues fixing up a house. You get all kinds of juicy details like:"I plugged in the heat gun and started to work. If the tiles had come up with relative ease, the stubborn black adhesive was a whole different ball game."OMG WHAT WILL SHE DO?!"I had to aim the heat gun inches from the mastic with my left hand, use the heat to soften it, and after precisely two minutes, quickly scrape up the goo with my right hand before it had time to harden again into a seemingly impregnable lump."I was so relieved that she was able to resolve that.There's also half a page devoted to her dragging a dress-form down from the attic. Scraping up linoleum. Cleaning the porch. Tiling the kitchen counters.Oh I almost forgot about the name-dropping! LOL! Prius, iPod, AirWalks, etc.And then! All her mommy issues are resolved because she stands up for herself by turning down a make-over. And she stands up to her daddy by demanding that she be allowed to keep the house HE inherited. HE also paid for all the renovations. Holy crap.Rich people problems are the best.

Do You like book The Fixer Upper (2009)?

Just a really fun light read...really likable main character

Great book, the first Mary kay Andrews I had read.

Entertaining. Light. No-brainer.

A really fun read!

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