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Stop Dressing Your Six-Year-Old Like A Skank: And Other Words Of Delicate Southern Wisdom (2006)

Stop Dressing Your Six-Year-Old Like a Skank: And Other Words of Delicate Southern Wisdom (2006)

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Rating
3.72 of 5 Votes: 3
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ISBN
0312339933 (ISBN13: 9780312339937)
Language
English
Publisher
st. martin's press

About book Stop Dressing Your Six-Year-Old Like A Skank: And Other Words Of Delicate Southern Wisdom (2006)

I love love love this woman’s books her humor is so good! She just tells it like it is in the chapter for the title of this book she writes about when her daughter grows up from 4-6x to size 7-16"There must be some mistake," I said. "These are, well, slutty-looking. I'm talking clothes for a little girl in first grade.""Thats all we got.""But these look like things a hooker would wear!"She smiled sadly. "You have no idea how many times I hear that every day." I enjoy the way she sees life and agree with her on most of what she writes, I wish I could put it as well as she does! She tackles everything from celebrity moms to the anti-carb movement to bin laden. No subject is safe and Celia Rivenbark will tell it like it is no matter who get offended and I love that about her, like she say I write a humor column not a news story.If you enjoy humor (i.e. Dave Barry) or the wit and wisdom of your southern outspoken aunt this book is for you al her books are hilarious I highly recommend them when you are looking for a laugh and some light-hearted reading 4 ½ Stars

The author is a newspaper columnist and this book was released in 2006, so the references are about 5 years old.Here are a few excerpts to show how hilarious this book was:"I get it. Now that my kid is practically of child-bearing age (is six the new seventeen?) I must choose from ripped-on-purpose jeans and T-shirts that scream things like "Baby Doll" and "Jail Bait", not to mention a rather angry "Girls Rule and Boys Drool!" where an embroidered flower with buzzing bee should be.When did this happen? Who decided that my six-year-old should dress like a Vegas showgirl? And one with an abundance of anger issues at that?""I made a little list of things I value that I'd like to see the politicians embrace.""...Children who scream in public places for no good reason. If your kids can't behave in public, for heaven's sake do what your grandmother did, and give 'em some Benadryl. Hey, it's not rocket science. A sleepy kid is far less likely to have the energy to chase his sister around the Target rounders with a newly mined booger, as I witnessed recently."

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Rivenbark's tone was meant to be sardonic and honest-to-a-fault, but often comes across as bitter and overly defensive. She is funny, there is no doubt that her voice has a strong, Southern twang that leaps out of the words, but she focuses so much on what she is not (A Supermom, hip, into documentaries, young) that the negativity becomes very tiring. There is a definite niche for these kinds of writings, and a need for it but Rivenbark's writing has become dated in just five years since publication. There are two references to Michael Jackson that had probably been funny while his trials were ongoing, but now that he has passed, just seem mean-spirited. There are also mentions of Hilary Duff, Days of Our Lives, and Paris Hilton, all three of which have not been part of the cultural zeitgeist for some time. And the most troubling part, much of Rivenbark's writing sounds lifted from mom blogs, which either speaks highly of Rivenbark's relatability or poorly of her originality. You pick.
—Tiffany

I love Celia Rivenbark! She always gets me rolling. This book of short essays focus on different aspects of Southern life - kids, husbands, celebrities, and other rites of Southern culture. The essay on obituaries was spot-on! Not to mention the visitation to the hospital. Lawd, I do know a few of these folks. And then there's her views on the food icons of the South, most specifically KK's - "Krispy Kreme doughnuts are the finest things on God's green earth." To which the proper response is a solemn "Amen, Sister!" I need to see if I can find Ms Rivenbark the next time I'm over in North Carolina so we can sit down and have a few (oh hell - just keep 'em coming) hot glazed KKs with a cold glass of milk. Heaven.
—Cindy

Rivenbark calls herself a "Slacker Mom" for not taking her child to Disney World until after all the other moms had taken their kids. Woah, lady, you are soooo bad!This book is overly precious, even for chick lit. The author spends a lot of time patting herself on the back for "telling it like it is." All in all, it was just cute; I didn't expect it to be a great work of literature, but I had hoped it might be wittier.It gets an extra star because the titular chapter is funny. But loses it again for not being able to come up with better portions of pop culture to lampoon than Britney, TomKat, and reality TV. And for over-using southern idioms, lest you forget that she is southern for a few sentences.
—Nicole

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