As a four-year-old boy, Paddy saw his father who had hanged himself from a tree, in despair at his wife's early death from cancer. Paddy was sent to an orphanage school run by nuns in Wexford. The nuns believed suicide was a crime and a grave sin, so when Paddy could not help talking about what he had seen, he was told he must be lying because people did not do that, and beaten unmercifully. This was in 1955 and it took thirty years for Paddy to find out the truth about his origins, and to be reunited with some of his family. He had been in the industrial school for several years before he was even told that he had a younger sister in another school. The nuns who cared for many boys behaved not just harshly but with ignorance and cruelty. The best option most boys could see for themselves in later life was being a priest, as this was the main role they saw for men, and Paddy became an altar boy which helped him see kindness from people in the town. In Dickensian manner the boys all ate from a bowl and spoon, so years on Paddy had no idea how to use a knife and fork, or what rashers, sausage and eggs were. A twisted gait of one foot worsened and at first young Paddy was beaten for it, then polio was mentioned by a doctor and he was sent to hospital in Wexford. He never saw the school again. He was made to stay in hospitals with old, dying men around him, who expected to die of operations and caused the boy continued terror that he would die in turn. This went on for years. The leg disimproved and he had several operations including brain surgery. No responsible adult was recorded on the charts permitting operations. Paddy finally got to mix with other young people and attend schooling again, and while he required a wheelchair after a time he was able to marry and have children and live independently, and he is now a disability campaigner. I remember this book being discussed when it first came out in 1988 and no real discussion of clerical abuse of position had taken place; the media did not quite know what to make of it. However it was discussed on shows for adults such as the Late Late Show and everyone became aware of what had been going on behind closed doors.
Paddy Doyle writes this book in a restrained adult voice but with all the detail and perspective of the child who suffered. In light of recent revelations, it is sadly not too difficult to accept that such an outrageous misadventure kept occurring to this orphan. First terribly harmed and then placed in authority care, Paddy fared little better physically or emotionally. He did manage to form attachments only to have them broken. Nevertheless, this is not a misery memoir but a spirited tale of ultimate achievement despite the most awful hardships. The author is to be commended for his life as well as for his literary achievement. A very worthwhile read, as are his other works.
