The philosophy of this book greatly resonated with my style (or who I strive to be) as a parent. It lays a framework for developing emotionally intelligent children, offers clear examples, and acknowledges the role of the parent as the person responsible for de-escalating (or escalating situations). The three pillars she bases the philosophy on are regulating yourself, fostering connection, and coaching- not controlling. It stresses the importance of parenting consciously, using your inner pause button, avoiding intervening when angry, and compassionate limit setting. It stresses that connection is the foundation to developing good choices in children. It offers many scenarios and simple (doesn't mean it's easy for us as parents) steps/ideas/solutions for common struggles and encourages parents to look at the root cause of behavior. I've used the concepts in this book so many times over the past month with positive outcomes- aborted or shortened tantrums, finding additional ways/ times to be playful, and most importantly reducing the negative impact on my emotions or energy. I HIGHLY recommend this- even if you have an "easier" kiddo at home. Overall, a helpful read in that I have a better understanding of what is going on in my child's brain and am better able to empathize. However, I think the major premise that misbehavior ONLY comes out of feeling relationally disconnected is too simplistic. Sometimes my child goes nuts and throws a tantrum not because he's disconnected from me relationally but because he really wants that cookie. However, I am more interested in this style of parenting than the alternative (Shepherding a Child's Heart).
Do You like book Peaceful Parent, Happy Kid (2000)?
Excellent, I would highly recommend this to anyone with kids or expecting kids.
—aimeepotter
Great realistic ideas for parents with young kids. Well researched.
—rbowden
As a parenting educator this one goes on the "recommend" pile!
—Ima
