“A roundtable discussion leading up to the publication of Dune: House Crappito” (April 2001):Publisher: Welcome gentlemen. So we've read the draft for the fifth novel in your Prelude to Dune series, and we'd like—Anderson: Third actually.Publisher: Excuse me?Herbert: It's the third in the series.Marketer: I believe they're right.Publisher: God, it certainly felt longer. Anyway, the third book you've written building on your father's classic work.Editor: Will this be the last?Herbert: The last in the series, but we plan on writing these books past our deaths. In fact, we have diagrams for the next 96 books in the series. We're planning on a conclusion, a pre-prequel, a series from the perspective of the sandworms, a series entirely made out of—Publisher: That's enough. We're talking about House Crappito today. So how do you boys feel about it?Anderson: It's my magnum opus.Herbert: A wonderful tribute to my father's legacy. If only he were here to witness this historic moment.Marketer: Yes. Well, we've had some complaints about the first two novels in the series, and while sales were generally positive, we're a little concerned that they're only going to get worse with this one.Editor: And the next one, and the next...Marketer: Indeed. Some fans of Dune are concerned that you are capitalizing on your father's legacy.Publisher: Not that there is anything wrong with a little capitalism.Herbert: Never.Anderson: I admit I am, but that's what I do. You see, I'm hired to take stuff other people have created, Star Wars, The X-Files and then--Editor: Not to mention it's a horrible read. I mean, come on, you have no character development, no depth, no—Anderson: There's depth. Sandworms are deep, man. Like hundreds of yards beneath the surface of Arrakis.Herbert: Yeah! High five, buddy. And there's Ix. That place is deep. A city underground, we're so brilliant for coming up with that one.Editor: What about a little symbolism or something? Nothing too heavy, I mean you are selling a sci-fi adventure here. But just something that paints the picture a little.Anderson: We'll add a spider.Herbert: And then Shaddam crushes it!Anderson: Yeah, high five, man. And a lizard!Herbert: What's the lizard do?Anderson: I don't know yet, but it'll be awesome.Marketer: What matters is sales. As long as it's selling, we're not going to interfere. But I'm really afraid they're going to slip even more with this one. I mean, you've got a story, but readers want DUNE. You understand what I'm saying?Anderson: Yeah, I do. We've got a story.Herbert: It's a great story.Anderson: It is. I love what you've done with it, man. Like that scene when the heighliner folds space and ends up in the middle of nowhere.Herbert: Yeah, and that scene you came up with where there's a swordfight to defend the castle 20,000 years in the future. Classic.Anderson: That happens in every other chapter.Herbert: That's because it's so damned good.Publisher: Boys. That's great. Good story. What about the rest of it?Herbert: Like what?Editor: Characters for starters.Herbert: Oh, they're great characters. My father, God bless him, came up with most of them.Editor: But in these prequels, they're, well, flat.Anderson: They're not flat. Baron Harkonnen is actually quite round.Herbert: I think he means figuratively.Anderson: Oh, right.Marketer: They are a bit—similar.Herbert: Leto is a loved leader. Shaddam a hated ruler.Anderson: And Harkonnen has sex with smooth skinned little boys.Editor: Yes, but you couldn't tell those things based on any of their actions. It's only because you tell us those things about them.Marketer: It would be nice to see these differences in character through the eyes of your characters.Herbert: You want us to show the Barron have sex with lots of little children?Anderson: I'm on it!Editor: Just make it so that I could pick up a line of dialogue and know who said it.Anderson: It does do that. After each line there's an attribution. 'Leto said,' 'Jessica said,' and so forth.Herbert: I think he means they should speak in different languages.Anderson: That's stupid. There aren't different languages throughout all these planets in the universe, just secret languages we like to tell the readers about. Everyone has a secret language. That's fun.Marketer: How come we never actually hear these secret languages?Herbert: Because it would confuse the reader.Anderson: Yeah, the reader is dumb.Herbert: That's why we continually have to remind the reader what they read in the previous chapter.Editor: Exactly! How many times must we be reminded that the Baron likes little boys?Anderson: Lots!Editor: How many times must the reader be reminded that Jessica is carrying a boy to make up for Victor? Or that Tleilaxu technology is inferior? Or that the artificial spice was created under the direction of Shaddam and blah blah blah? It's tedious.Herbert: But if we don't remind the reader, how will he remember?Editor: It just happened! Ten pages earlier. And fifteen before that. And eight before that! In the book before that one. How many reminders does the reader need?Publisher: I think we need to step back here and—Editor: Oh, I plan on stepping back alright. I can't do this anymore. I can't take it.Publisher: Now, now. Will House Crappito sell enough to warrant it's publication?Herbert: Yes.Anderson: Definitely.Marketer: I believe it will, sir. Our reports show nerds will buy about anything we tell them to.Publisher: Good. That's what I want to hear. Now boys, you're gonna take these concerns we've shared with you in the next batch of novels you write, right?Editor: No, no more. No more! I can't take it.Anderson: Brian, we should replace the editor with a facedancer.Herbert: Great idea, KJ.Anderson: Thank you, I know it is.Herbert: Speaking of great ideas, I had an idea about our seventh series. What if we make the books take place in the present day, but all the paths lead to Dune?Anderson: It would be like a prequel 20,000 years in the past. Awesome!Herbert: Think of all the series we could fill in between them.Anderson: Exactly. When do we start?Herbert: Next week's out for me, I'll be watching a Star Wars marathon.Anderson: What about the weekend?Herbert: Yeah, we should be able to crank it out in twelve hours.Anderson: Will there be a character in the book who likes little boys?Herbert: Of course there will be, KJ. Of course there will.
I sometimes wish that the rating system on Goodreads allowed for half-stars, or even quarter stars, because that's much closer to what I feel this book deserves, rather than the overly nice gift of a single star. To be blunt, Kevin J. Anderson should stick with the light fare of Star Wars books, and Brian Herbert should leave his father's legacy alone, and find another means of making a living...say, the fast food industry, if his writing skills are any indication.This series is a perfect example of the trap that all ghost-writers fall into when the creator of a vast and well-detailed series dies or is unable to complete the project: no matter how good the notes, the person attempting to pick up where it was left off will always fail...oft-times MISERABLY. It happened with Zelazny's Amber series, and it's happening here with the Dune series.Where to begin? Well...The characters are caricatures of their former, well-detailed selves. The voice used within the book is unpolished and jarringly different from Frank Herbert's style. Several unexplained story details that didn't -need- to be explained are thrown in as tack-ons that are a waste of word count. The supposed 'comedic' scenes are clumsy and contrived, and the "climactic" moment where Piter DeVries is running off with an infant Paul actually made me yawn - it should be noted that the knowledge that a character cannot be killed because we've already read books that happen -after- the moment they're supposed to be in danger does not lend it self credibly towards building suspense. How is a character supposed to be in deadly danger as an infant when we've already read how they end up running roughshod over the entire universe with an army of fanatical worshipers? It is a trap that the authors should have considered, then discarded immediately as a waste of effort - or if not them, then the editor, if he or she had any familiarity with the original epic tale that is Dune.All in all, if you're looking for a sense of completeness, please feel free to read these books, as the apparently scant notes that Frank Herbert left behind do show through. But don't expect the same vivid, vibrant storytelling that came through in the original Dune series. UPDATE: THIS WEBPAGE CAN SUMMARIZE MY FEELINGS FAR BETTER THAN ANYTHING I COULD EVER COME UP WITH. HENCEFORTH, I SHALL SIMPLY REFER YOU TO THE FOLLOWING WEBSITE WHENEVER ANYTHING HAVING TO DO WITH THIS CRAPFEST OF A SERIES IS MENTIONED!http://ragecollection.com/573:)
Do You like book House Corrino (2002)?
House Corrino is the final book in the House trilogy and takes the reader on a journey of the events leading up to pinnacle of the Dune saga series, Dune. Jessica is pregnant with Duke Leto's son and had gone against Bene Gesserit's orders and had a boy instead of a girl. Has she wrecked centuries of breed programs? Rhombur is finally ready to re-take Ix. Will he triumph with all of Atreides military force or will the evil, disgusting Bene Theiluxu triump again? And Shaddam is settling into his reign as Emperor. Will he be a popular and well like Emperor or make some fatal mistakes?I really enjoyed this re-read of House Corrino. There are so many plots within plots and for such a long book (600+ pages) it is such a page turner. Having read this series quite a few time I always enjoy the vast variety of characters. The inter-plots between the Bene Gesserit and Shaddam are always amuse me as each tries to wrestle for power. Overall this re-read was really enjoyable. The House trilogy is still my favorite of all the books written by Kevin J Anderson and Brian Herbert. Next on my re-reading journey is Dune, and I can't wait to read (again!) the book that started it all.
—bella
Ah, what can I say in my defense... When I first read this book, I was young and impressionable, barely a teenager. It was my first encounter with the Dune universe, and having not known the magnificence of Frank Herbert's imagination and work, I foolishly thought this book to be good. Yes, I will admit my great sin: I thought this book was good. Now, older and hopefully wiser, I will try to absolve myself by doing penance. I shall write a tutorial on how to shamelessly exploit a great work of art, while simultaneously desecrating the memory of a beloved parent. Enjoy.*****************************************************************************************************So you had a famous father, who had written what is said to be the monument of science fiction, paralell only to Lord of the rings in the fantasy genre. You are thinking and thinking and thinking, trying to figure out a cunning way to:a) desecrate your deceased father's name and personb) somehow destroy/diminish the value of your deceased father's capital workc) all of the above.Well, look no further. Here, I'll be providing you with an easy-to-follow guide which will help you to make your deceased father turn in his grave! Are you excited?1) Get yourself familiar with the idea of writing prequels sequels and interquels to your father's capital work. It doesn't matter that you are not a writer, or that you have never attempted to write anything longer or more poetic than your CV. You'll learn it in stride!2) If you are still uncomfortable with the idea of writing, be smart: get in cahoots with a person who has been longer in this exploiting business than you. With your new colleague and bosom brother, who has tons of experience in writing spin-offs of other people's ideas, writing books will be a piece of cake!3) Plot, plot, plot. Remeber, plot is everything, and if that means sacrificing character development and world building, then by all means, go for it.4) As mentioned in point 3), you really don't need world building, world expanding, or 3D characters. If you have enough fast paced plot, you're fine. Besides, your father had made his books too difficult by overburdening them with such redundant things.5) When you're writing, remember: tell, don't show. For the sake of your audience. Your departed father did too much of showing. Way too much.6) Use simplistic language, without much embellishemnts, or without your dead father's signature philosophical undertones. Too much of the latter makes cumbersome books; yours must be feather light!7) Don't be afraid to be redundant! That way, you can get things nailed into your reader's heads! Don't make the same mistakes your father had done by implying, seed planting and making the audience think. 8) Don't be afraid to shamelessly crank out books. You have to make a living, after all.If you follow all these steps, you will achieve your goal! Congratulations! *confetti falls from the sky* Not only will you commit a sacrilege towards the memory of your deceased father, but you will also commit one to his legacy! And, as an added bonus, you will also make big bucks by exploiting your family name. You are the winner!
—Martina
There are contradictions and retcons abound in this book. Originally, Elrood had ruled for 34 years, not 138 as this trilogy claimed. Ix was ruled by a group, not House Vernius.If Frank Herbert had decided to write a precursor to Dune, he could easily have done so in one book, not three. The drama between Leto, Kailea, their son (not Paul! Gasp!), and Rhombur was unnecessary filler, and the Baron is portrayed in this book as a rabid woman-hating man where in Dune he had been hinted at being gay, and his attitude towards women wasn't as misogynistic. Many, many original characters clutter up this trilogy and the canon characters are rather different, for a rather unsatisfying read.This trilogy really is nothing more than fan-fiction, freely abound with retcons and mistakes that would make anyone else ashamed, but apparently Brian and Kevin simply don't care about anything but the money these books generate.Any true Dune fan should never consider anything by that pair as more than poorly-written fanfiction.
—Delicious Strawberry
