Do You like book But Inside I'm Screaming (2005)?
I keep a couple of stacks of paperbacks piled up on my nightstand, which is actually a bookcase, for those "just in case" moments when I either don't have anything to read or don't like what I've been reading or just need a break from something heavier. This book was in that stack, or one of them, picked up quite awhile ago from a Friends of the Library sale cart. I pick things up for all kinds of reasons, the title, a review I've read, a recommendation from friends or goodreads, because I saw it at Costco or maybe just because I have a potent need to know that I have at least a few books waiting in the wings, as it were. I've no idea why I selected this book in the first place, possibly the title, nor what exactly made me decide it was time to read it, but I did like it, not love it, just liked it. "But Inside I'm Screaming" is the story of Isabel who on the very eve of starting a medical leave from her job, which she plans to spend committing suicide, freezes up on national television, live with breaking news. Her subsequent break down has her admitted to a psychiatric hospital where her initial goal is simple: get "privileges" so she walk down to the road and step in front of first passing vehicle, preferably a truck. From here the story switches back and forth between the present, peeks inside the psych ward, group therapy, and bed checks, and the past, both her recent past and her childhood, the events of Isabel's life that landed her in the nut hut. Sometimes dark and sad, sometimes funny, ultimately hopeful, a fairly easy and quick read, and I liked it. Not everyone's cup of tea but if you are curious or concerned about mental illness and mental hospitals you might like it too.
—Susanhayeshotmail.com
What happened to Isabel? An upcoming news anchor with a bright future freezes on camera. Unable to bear the shame of her failure and ridicule of her colleagues, she takes a blade to her wrists.She is saved; committed to a hospital, sharing a living space with people who don’t have it together. She doesn’t think she’s like them. She has dark thoughts, but she can control them. Can’t she?What brought her here? Readers may find this story weaker than that of Girl, Interrupted. In fact, the story seems to mimic Girl, Interrupted in various ways. On the other hand, the events are not as sensationalized. No late night partying sprees on the town here, though one patient does try to engineer an escape that backfires horribly. It was a book I wanted to finish in one sitting. I wanted Isabel to restore herself in her career and her interpersonal relationships. I suppose I wanted to know that it was possible for her. She has to make some changes, but slowly I see her opening up to the hope that she can live as an imperfect person.
—Kate
This book was a bit of a surprise for me. I wasn't sure I would like it, as the subject matter is a bit heavy. A network news anchor has a breakdown on live TV while reporting on the death of Princess Diana. She attempts suicide and ends up in an inpatient psychiatric treatment facility. Not exactly easy material. But the story moved very quickly. Isabel can't see that she has serious mental issues so she fights the treatment. Once she reaches the very depths of despair, her doctor suggests shock treatments -which of course Isabel tries to resist.The story bounces back and forth between treatment and flashes to Isabel's past, both with her parents and with her abusive husband. While I liked the way the story was told, I felt that none of Isabel's relationships were fully defined. You don't understand why she befriends the people she befriends. And perhaps that is part of the character development... she doesn't know how to form friendships so we never see her discuss them. But overall, I think it was a really good read.
—Sydney
